An "Engaging" Time on San Andres Isla

Had been working at Fidelity for almost four months and after 8 weeks of training and they 8 more weeks of intense job immersion, I was ready as I always am, for a little time away from the States to unwind and relax. Of course, I was also dying to see my bebe, Lyz aka La Chica Feliz aka L Tres. We arranged to meet on San Andres Island, which is part of Colombia though it is closer to Nicaragua. So how is it a Colombian possession? Read this link for the scoop:


http://www.kafka-franz.com/san-andres-island.htm

San Andres is actually pretty accessible from the US though few American gringos go there (which is great, no ugly Americans so it still remains a bit of a hidden gem) but during the wintery season word is that Canadians are chartered down en masse and for some reason Italians go there even though it is pretty far away. And, of course, tons of Colombians because no passport or visa is necessary. That is what made it easy for Lyz-less than a two hour flight from Cartagena. For me, it was two hours to LAX (abhor that airport) then I flew with Copa Air to Panama City for 6 hours and then a 45 minute flight to San Andres. Easy.

In a way, SA is what you would expect. Pretty typical Caribbean island as far as what it has to offer. Some hotels, some resorts and lots of duty free shopping. However, I do have to say due to the extensive reef system surrounding it (some claim only Belize is better in the Caribbean), the water is pretty spectacular with the claim of 7 shades of blue to be seen. The main beach in the Centro area where most everything is is very, very clean and the sand is great. This area is pedestrian only along the main 10 minutes walkway so it is pretty tranquil for a slightly urban beach area with many hotels/resorts residing across the walkway. I waited out my scuba excursion until day six as the weather was dicey at times-it was around the start of hurricane season and there were a few good downpours and a few afternoons where the beach was not an option, but overall we got 4 solid days of beach time so we did alright that way.

On our second full day, after booking a pretty basic hotel for Saturday night and Sunday in advance just to make sure we had something (we got in at about 2 pm on that Saturday and knew we would be in no mood to search for a place), we tried to see if any of the resorts were running deals since we just hit low season. No luck, all the good ones were booked. Went to a final resort on the main strip and they were booked BUT they managed an apt. a block away from them and the beach that was available. They were asking $100 a night. It was unreal. It was 3 bedrooms, almost brand new and about 1300 sq. ft. We took it. Then we rented a golf cart (yes, true) as the island is shaped like a seahorse and is only 13 kms. by 3 kms. We “puttered” down to an area called San Luis that was known for it's lovely beaches. Very true and it only took us about 30 minutes to get down there with a break for lunch at a very local spot. It was a sweet afternoon on a little slice of sand with a bunch of local kids having a ball nearby.

We stayed at that apartment for two nights and switched for the last three nights to a place nearby that was certainly not as great (Tres Casitas) but it was quaint and our room overlooked the clear water from the second floor. After checking in we spent a rainy Wednesday afternoon watching a Russ Meyer flick that I brought that Lyz totally dug.

On Thursday morning the sky was clear and I walked two minutes over to the dive shop and booked a morning dive. Done by 12:30, I was starving so we found a small, family run place and ate some typical local food-fish or chicken or pork with bean, coconut rice and fried plantains. Not bad for $4 each. They we arranged to go to a spot called the Aquario that sits off of Haynes Cay. In the late afternoon the stingrays congregate near a few sandbars in the area. I had hung with rays in Tahiti ten years ago and they are awesome creatures. But it was Lyz's first time and she was delighted and it was a great afternoon excursion.

The next day was spent going to the nearby Johnny Cay which is a little paradise of a regional park but is pretty touristy with tons of boats coming all day long and lots of people so it was far from romantic. But still the water was amazing, the sand was even softer, the Rastas were all over the place working and pouring Coco Locos and hawking Old Milwaukies (for some reason that I never got an explanation for, Old Milwaukie and Miller High Life seem to be as popular as the national Colombian brands on the island with the locals-yet in Cartagena there were no where to be seen-weird) and cooking up fish and whatnot. And it only took us about 15 or so mins. to walk around the cay. I did not get any photos on Johnny Cay as my camera went bad that morning but Lyz took video and I will post a clip some time after she downloads her clips. After that we went back to the jewelry shop we had been talking to and Lyz picked out her engagement ring. Yes, I got engaged and I could not be happier.

Now we will have to deal with the idiotic US immigration bureaucracy over the next year. Lyz will finish her Masters in Nursing next July in Cartagena and then will come here. I already have some contacts in the US and Colombia to give me advice on how it make the process work best. We will meet up somewhere down there again in mid-December and then probably again in April of 2010.

The Greatest Albums of All Time in No Particular Order (entry #5)

Terminal Cheesecake- King of All Spaceheads (Jackass Records)

The trip begins with a sample of the famous line from Timothy Leary, “The aim of the game is to feel real good” on the opening title track. After that the drug references JUST KEEP COMING ad nauseam. Yet this is not just some hippy-dippy psychedelic album. In fact, it reinvents everything to do with the genre that got its start in the mid 60s and based on everything since, it closes the door with this release about 30 years later in the mid 90s. But let’s digress as they surely would…

Terminal Cheesecake is a brightly dark, sorely obscure British outfit that was noisy and arty and thrashy and all that circa the late 80s. They released a few spectacular though highly uneven works until they hit their stride with their 1990 Pathological Records release, “Angels in Pigtails” which featured an ultra-menacing cover of the Residents classic “Hello Skinny” that was an all out war on the original in a very good way. After that, they ratcheted up the all out drug war to the point of being blatantly obvious-just in case. They followed that up with the exquisite “Pearlesque Kings of the Jewmost” in 1992 that is on par with this release though a bit uneven and repetitious at time (the mythology surrounding the session for this album is that they laid down one basic track and then manipulated it into all the other tracks minus the cover of the Neu! classic, “Seeland” retitled as “Neu Sealand”).

http://www.godflesh.com/related/terminal.html

This album marked the ultimate and necessary end of their existence as their various member moved on to other projects and adventures with VERY middling success. To me, this represents the culmination of their vision, their apex, one of the greatest head trips ever recorded in the annals of musical insanity. Simply put, though they have a very, very dedicated following here and there, they never, ever got their due in England or anywhere else for that matter. Quite distressing. Anyway, on to the tuneage…

But first we interrupt this important message with a message about the art work. See the above pics. That is the exterior and interior covers. ‘Nuff said.

Now back to the our regularly scheduled musical musings.

So I mentioned that the title track starts with a little Timothy Leary. Then the very languid and very thick drums “kick” in. With a little acid surf guitar, elongated and all. And your “announcer” is back and has another special announcement-“What you are listening to musicians performing psychedelic music under the influence of a mind altering chemical”. The tone is set. And the track ambles and rambles beautifully from there.

“Budmeister” is next with just about the thickest booty shaking beat with tons of acid guitar and other insect like noises that should create a dance floor sensation with nasty chanted and echoed vocals. Only, for some strange reason, I was the only one dancing to this track-though I imagine there were cool DJs in England spinning it.

Next up is “God’s Turban and Tutu” rolling along for about 9 minutes or so with the sweetest dub style bassline while our vocalist is running down a list of the preferred substances, “LSD, Mescaline, Psilocybin, etc” in a very hushed tone whilst claiming that you should “walk before jesus”.

“Ginge le Geezer” clocks in as probably the most straight forward track-all dense acid guitar with a 4/4 disco/rock beat that gets the hips shaking with a regular verse/chorus structure. Yet it is still nefarious.

Lo and behold it is “Lo Lo” and “Tibetan Lift Off” where they get all Himalayan on you. Sampling the echoed long ass horns of the Tibetan monks (they have toured the US many a time), the Cheesecake dub out some of their earlier track beats and let it all flail about.

Shortly thereafter, “Herbal Space Flight” plays off of the aforementioned “Ginge le Geezer”, only more acid metal, if such a genre exists. And you can still dance to it.

After a couple of fits and starts with “Black Microdot I and II” (featuring some AWESOME Mariachi samples), the opus magnus concludes with “The Last Temptation of St. Leary” which brings everything full circle with Gregorian chant samples as well as Mr. Leary mentioning that “the LSD trip is a pilgrimage for thousands of years for mystics and visionary philosophers” .

In the end, this album is best experienced with a pair of “kick ass” headphones, just like many albums back in the day. Illicit substances may or may not assist you though, depending on your internal chemical composition.

Always "Wing"in' it

It has been a somewhat somber two weeks or so if you are Detroit Red Wings hockey team devotee. Up 3 games to 2 over the Pittsburgh Penguins in the Stanley Cup final on June 12th and coming off a 5-0 shellacking of the Pens in game 5 five days earlier, the ultimate North American sports franchise over the past two decades somehow found themselves on the losing end of consecutive 2-1 defeats including game 7 at home-something a road team had not done in a finals game 7 since 1971. A tough pill to swallow. Still, this is a franchise that does it the right way with the right management at the top and without idiotic or unlikable players and no one can argue with their success and their up tempo, artistic style of play.

One must remember or know that since NHL expansion in the late 60s from 6 to 12 teams, they went almost 20 years as one of the worst teams and for a time in the 70s they were referred to as the Dead Wings and had last won a Stanley Cup championship in 1955 way before I was around. I grew up through adolescence with them during this era. It blew. They did finally manage to get to the Western Conference finals in 1987 and won game one in Edmonton, only to be trounced in 4 straight by the mighty Oilers who were extending their dynasty.

They flirted on and off with success over the next 8 seasons and finally managed to get back to the Stanley Cup finals in 1995 (first time since the early sixties) only to routed by the abhorrently dull, defensive and pedestrian New Jersey Devils in a sweep. But they kept at it and finally broke through and won a Cup in 97’ and once again the next year in 98’ with a bunch of Russians both times and re-tooled and won another in 02’ with a quirky Czech goalie legend and then re-tooled with a bunch of Swedes and won last year. The blueprint was always the same-elegant teamwork with a solid work ethic. So as much as Wings fans rue the loss this year, they are still 4-2 in Cup finals since 95’ and have appeared in 6 of the last 14 Cup finals (there was no Cup awarded in 2005 due to the idiotic lock out which shut down the season). No one else in the league is even close to that kind of run and they have been in the playoffs every year since 1991, usually a 1 or 2 seed going into the playoffs. No other franchise in any other major sport comes close either. So if you are not a hockey fan and are looking for a team to follow, of course I recommend them as the place to start, no matter how biased I am.

The Greatest Albums of All Time In No Particular Order (entry # 4)

Throbbing Gristle- Heathen Earth-1980 (Industrial Records)

I recently rediscovered this somewhat lost album that I adored as it officially is considered not exactly a proper album release by them (they only did two studio albums before this) as it was recorded live in the studio and was also officially their last release in 1980 but in all senses this is a proper album with all new material and it cemented TG as the ultimate forebearers of industrial music (after all their label was called Industrial Records) that permeates the mainstream from the good (Ministry) to the bad (Nine Inch Nails)-they are that influential to this very day and kill most of the fakers out there. Plus, they have the greatest band name ever. I mean, who doesn't want their gristle to throb, am I right?

Why did I stumble across it? Well, TG was just back on tour in the US for the first time in about 30 years with all the original members and doing more dates than just Frisco (heck, they played that hipster fest Coachella too):


http://www.losanjealous.com/2009/02/04/throbbing-gristle-to-tour-usa-play-6000-capacity-tent-at-coachella-ucla/

So you end up going through phases and hitting amazing things again that got left as gristle on the roadside.

So the legend of TG endures. And this album is the best introduction in my estimation as it is not as obtuse as some of their early work (Hamburger Lady, anyone?) though it is highly dark and experimental yet doesn't dabble in some of the pop like results that show up on some of their singles
(“United” is better than any love song that ABBA put out in my estimation and I love ABBA). This album in particular makes total noise somewhat comforting and lovable if that makes sense.

It commences with “Cornets”-four minutes plus of Cosi Fanni Tutti (ex-stripper and perfect fetish girl, BTW) riffing on a cornet-


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cornets

in very processed/looped way that hints at the concepts of Fripp/Eno regarding what they did with guitar. Truly outer spacious. “The Old Man Smiled” follows with it's creepy beat with Genesis P- Orridge mumbling about “can the world be as sad as it seems? in a cafe in Tangiers” over some of the most sinister guitar feedback and drumbox foxtrot ambling ever put down on tape.

Shortly after that, is the ultra cinematic “The World Is A War Film” with the ultimate electronically looped synths providing the basis for the nastiest dreamwalk. Which leads to “Dreamachine”-probably the greatest industrial tune ever san vocals. That devolves into “Still Walking”-an echoed dialogue between the aforementioned Cosi Fanni Tutti and Chris Carter (they were lovers and husband/wife back then and still are-TG folks are so trad and the Republicans would love them!) about hooking up for some “action” done with all kinds of spectacular vocal effects and delays and loops and whatnot.

The work closes under the uber funky and cornet led “Don't Do As You Are Told, Do As You Think” in which Gen seems to “dictate” that we should all be Libertarians (at least in my interpretation). In closing, TG might be one of the most obscure but most influential acts out there.

Windsor aka Wheezy aka Cheese Dog!

So when I was about 6 years old, around first grade, our family made the big move from a particularly nasty area of inner-city Detroit to the suburban wonderland that is Dearborn, world headquarters for the lamest owner in sports, William Clay Ford, but I digress. Now we had room and needed a dog, of course. So Dad found an Old English Sheepdog at some farm that I recall being somewhere west of Ann Arbor, though I can't be sure as the memories are fuzzy now at my advance age. We got a puppy that we dubbed Barney and he was a great dude that I took much care of until he left this mortal coil around my junior year of high school. He developed some varied health issues and needed to be put to sleep but he lived a full life.

Fast forward about 15 years without a dog and the ex and I have acquired our first house in Portland in mid-1996. As we settle in we settle on the fact that we need a dog particularly since our house already came with a completely fenced in yard. I can be convincing at times and the choice was made to acquire another OES. Early spring of 97' rolls around and I am on the hunt. I locate one in the want ads of the Oregonian and the deal sounds too good to be true-$100 including a large transport crate. Heck, those things ran about $150 new back then.

We visit the couple with the OES (she's got papers and she goes by Elsie-yuck!) and the story is that they got her as a puppy from a respected breeder after the last of their kids went off to college. Turns out, bad planning as he is a building contractor and she is a real estate agent they don't have the time to care for her and train her properly as she now approaches age two. At first I was hesitant. Yes, it was clear that they didn't have time to take care of her-in fact, they had her coat sheared and she looked goofy all buzzed. Second, she seemed a tad rambunctious. Well, I thought, I am always up for a challenge. They liked the fact I knew the breed and even arranged to drive across town and drop her off. Oh my...

It was very apparent immediately that Windsor (as we dubbed her-gotta keep with the British Isles names) had almost no training, no barriers at all. She was bonkers to say the least. All energy, all random action. We didn't know what to do and Cyndy was openly distraught. Well, after a month of this chaos, we learned about this ex-Marine dog trainer who did things differently. Instead of paying for a set of classes or by the class, his deal was you paid a one time flat fee. Not cheap. But he guaranteed success no matter how many sessions it took until you were happy with the results. If it took 10 sessions, so be it. If it took 50, fine. Well dang, it worked after about 15 sessions. Of course most of the training was training us what to do. That was fine. I was only interested in results and it worked.

Shortly thereafter we took Windsor on her first trip with us for a week for our first time all the way down the glorious Oregon coast camping and rafting and then inland for hanging/hiking at Crater Lake NP. She did alright for the most part (except for the time she jumped out of the car with the window rolled down while we were crawling through the campground-she was fine-and the time she accidentally nipped my nose all open and bloody while barking at a semi trailer truck loudly going by while she was leashed in the back seat) and it looked like a long term match for sure.

In short time, she developed into our greatest bud. Curiously, she loved other people but had almost no tolerance for her canine peers. She learned to roller blade (well, as in, I roller bladed down the street as she pulled me with all her might while I veered back and forth like a was water skiing holding her leash-it was the neighborhood sensation). And she even learned to fetch instead of herding, a genetic trait she would roll out on occasion that cracked everyone up.



Through thick and thin she has always been there for me with a big wet tongue, her prancing antics and ready for a lay on-the-back belly rub with her back legs kicking. I am writing this as she turns fourteen today which is marvelous and almost unheard of for OESs and almost all other breeds of her size (she once weighed 85 lbs. but is down to 77 which is normal at her age). Essentially, she is in great shape and usually very healthy with no illnesses. Yes, of course, she is suffering from the vagaries of old age (her hearing is diminished, her eyesight is down to about 25% which is not a big deal for dogs as they don't really rely on sight so much anyway and her joints have gone downhill in the past two years-she's on a joint medication prescription which helps but she can still smell her beloved cheese from across the room). She can hardly run anymore but she tries when we hit the nearby park-she's a trooper and I adore her. Something tells me she still has another year or two left in her-as long as I am around to lift her off the Spanish tile that she prefers to lay on despite the fact that I have large area rugs for her around my house-I guess being English she is a bit stubborn, particularly in old age.

The Greatest Albums of All Time In No Particular Order (entry # 3)

Wire- 154 (1979)

Can never figure out the Wire fans who consistently list this last out of the first three albums. Pink Flag has it's moments but most of it's attempts at "punk rock" or whatever are cringe-worthy and embarrassing at times but understandable on a first release. Chairs Missing ups the ante and finds them branching out and finding their sound more without regard to the prevalent punk attitude of 1978. 154 (supposedly named after the number of gigs they had done up to the time of this recording) solidifies their unique vision and around 1979 only PIL and Joy Division share a similar uniqueness of sound that defy pigeon-holing in the post-punk realm and explores whole new possibilities of style and sound. In fact, they worked with producer Mike Thorne on this who later worked with the likes of John Cale, The The, Laurie Anderson and Soft Cell. Thus, it makes sense that they broke up after this masterpiece (how could they top it?) and haven't even come close since reforming and mostly dabbling in electro-punk-pop (or something like that).

Side one is simply a masterpiece and easily outdoes side two but that is no slight. It starts off languidly and stoicly with “I Should Have Known Better” with deep tenor vocals by bassist Graham Lewis. This start is juxtaposed by the short, aggressive alienated art-punk numbers “Two People in a Room” and “The 15th” sung by Colin Newman. “The Other Window” is otherworldly with a plaintive spoken word account by Graham from a train seat augmented by eerily echoed guitar lines. Shortly thereafter, the side nears an end with the epic and bombastic “A Touching Display” that builds in facets and haunted by Graham's vocals.

Side two is the “poppier” side for lack of a better term. “A Mutual Friend” followed by “A Blessed State” reminds one of an Eno piece circa “Another Green World”-lilting approaches with lots of open space and exotic Hawaiian style guitar effects. Ironically, the “hit” (after all, they were signed to a major label deal of sorts in the U.S. but of course the label didn't know what to do with them ) “Map Ref. 41N 93W” is probably the most straight forward pop track on the album, seemingly a left over from the Chairs Missing sessions. The album closes with the mountingly claustrophobic “40 Versions” building to a crescendo and a feedback embellished crash.

I first got this album in late 1980 and it's production values and sound still sound classic today and have stood the test of time-Radiohead, who I do enjoy only wish they could come up with something this original-but in their defense it was already done. I've listened to thousands of albums in a quarter century (it simply blew my mind when I came across it in high school) and 154 remains easily embedded in my all time Top Ten. Indeed, they were the post-punks beating Pink Floyd at their own game around the time they came out with the splendid “The Wall”.

Coolin' In Cartagena

In 2002, a year after a great... introduction to South America with two weeks in Brasil, the ex and I found ourselves in a situation with enough frequent flier miles to do a round trip to the Caribbean/Central America. We ended up going to Isla Margarita (off the coast of Venezuela and part of it) and Trinidad. We had researched Colombia too but after reading the U.S. State Dept. report at the time that issued a strong travel warning, we stayed a little east. Now there has been a reversal-Venezuela is a mess (during my time in Colombia I met some Canadians who started in Venezuela but high-tailed it to Colombia due to all the hassles in Chavez loco-land) and Colombia is the place to go as two term president, Alvaro Uribe, has managed to stabilize much politically and economically over the past 5-7 years.

In late 06' while in Vietnam, met a Brit who said he spent 2-3 months wandering around Colombia a year or two before and he said it was fantastic. And then in mid 08', Anthony Bourdain debuted his episode on it on "No Reservations" on the Travel Channel and he raved about it calling it a “vacation wonderland” & I was sold.

http://anthony-bourdain-blog.travelchannel.com/read/colombia-vacation-wonderland

Just had to figure when I might go. Well, in mid-February I managed to start chatting with a linda nurse chica named Lyz online and on skype so now I had a good reason to get there ASAP. After some planning and parlaying some sky miles and a cheap international fare from Miami (it's less than 3 hours to Cartagena), I was on my way in late March.

Well I recently got back from Cartagena (plus a few days near Santa Marta and Tayrona NP up the coast a few hours toward Venezuela at a really nice and inexpensive all inclusive resort) and it was truly amazing-it is still truly a hidden gem as far as most tourists go. The historic old walled city is amazing-it is clean and ultra safe, well taken care of with lots of culture/history and everything was vibrant. About a week in, Lyz and I decided to eat at La Cevicheria where Anthony started his episode but Jorge, his host for ½ of the episode wasn't there that night. But we stopped by a week later as things were getting busy for the upcoming Easter holiday and he was there and showed him a pic I have of me and a friend with Anthony in Portland Oregon and it cracked him up and he said he needs to be back in touch with Tony. BTW, on our first night together, we ate at another great place, La Vitrola, which has garnered an international reputation.

The greater Cartagena area is easy to get around without a lot of traffic (the population is only about a million). And most things are quite affordable from apartment rentals to food to taxis. I stayed in Laguito, a beach neighborhood and a ten minute taxi ride to Centro (the old walled city) is always about $2-3 one way. The actual beach here and at nearby Boca Grande are typical urban beaches which resemble the scene in Rio at Copacabana and Ipanema. However, there is less of a beach culture here and the beaches aren't as nice so that part of it doesn't measure up. However the more Caribbean beaches near Santa Marta and Tayrona NP are spectacular. In fact the mellow beach at the National Park is called “Cristal Playa” for a good reason.

http://travel.webshots.com/album/571069118WQYLZO

Yes, I was pleasantly surprised by Colombia, particularly Cartagena. I could see myself living there some day. It's in the central time zone and only 3 hours from the U.S. as I mentioned. The climate is mild. It was about 85 every day I was there and it didn't rain once. There is some mid day humidity but the kicker is the full sea breeze that permeates the city every day in the afternoon and into the evening. And I can certainly not complain about strolling around the breezy Centro most evenings.