Terminal Cheesecake steals from some original cheesecake

Previously I have been known to rant on my music review section on this blog entitled “The Greatest Albums of All Time in No Particular Order”. This past summer, I did an entry on those acid addled pranksters, Terminal Cheesecake's last album and referenced their prior album “Pearlesque Kings of the Jewmost”. Well, recently I was wasting “valuable” time at work looking at a crazy cover art site and ran across the following:

http://www.317x.com/albums/z/sizentner/card.html

Well I thought, that surely looked familiar to me! It was the artwork on the back cover of the aforementioned album by the Cheesecake blokes! Well, that is surely a delightful "artistic" heist. I guess it can be accounted for by the supposedly legendary amounts of mind altering chemicals they consumed during their tenure. Sweet.

Classic Colombia!

Was able to use up my remaining vacation time for the calendar year and get back down to Cartagena to see Lyz for about 10 days and to spend more time getting to know her family. Once again the weather was sunny though hot and humid (about 90 F each day with about 80% humidity) but I will take that over tropical rain any time. Once again, we had a great dinner at the La Vitrola restaurante in Centrol on Saturday night shortly after I arrived. The next day we spent some time at the historic castle, San Felipe Castillo, that overlooks the city and was a bastion against invaders but not any sort of residence. We lolled around and got a lot of great pics (see my Webshots link later on).

In the early evening we meet up with Lyz's papi and her brother and his girlfriend at the Cartagena futbol stadium. Real Cartagena were playing their archrivals, Junior de Barranquilla. Barranquilla is about an hour or so away up the northeast coast and is more of a port/commericial center. Lyz's mami is originally from there and her father is originally from Cartagena. But because they lived in Barranquilla for a long time, they are all Junior fans so they had to be on their best behavior. :) In fact, security is pretty intense-you get padded down by policia at about 4 different checkpoints and the serious Junior fans coming from Barranquilla are herded into a blocked off section by the end corner of one of the goals and are escorted into the stands by policia after the game is about 5 minutes old and the same is true near the end of the game. While there is significant security, I did not witness any loco behavior, unlike the time in 2006 when I attended a match at Maracana, the massive stadium in Rio de Janeiro where two city rivals were also playing. Lyz's papi (he's a retired federal police detective) negotiated some scalped tickets for about $5 each so I got us all into the match for about $25-not a bad deal. Too bad it ended in a 0-0 draw.

After getting organized on Monday, we took a flight on Tuesday through Bogota to Bucaramanga. Near there is the massive Chicamocha Canyon, about an hour and ½ drive away. We spent two nights in Bucaramanga, using Wednesday to plan our excursion to the relativey new National Park there and San Gil (another hour and a ½ from Chicamocha) and get a car booked for rental. Bucaramanga has the sixth largest city economy/population in Colombia (similar to Cartagena/Barranquilla), with just over a million people in its metropolitan area. Bucaramanga is known as the "City of Parks" and "Colombia's Beautiful City". It sits in a large bowl-like valley-a pleasant location with the standard large amount of high rise buildings, nice vistas and a more temperate climate-it was about 80 F each day.

Being a little more out in the country per se, we noticed they certainly enjoy their “carne” and we soon realized that the portions were outrageous. At a nice restaurante by our hotel, I ordered one of “steaks” with all the trimmings. I ordered the medio or medium size. It was monsterous-about a foot long and came with a plethora of arepas (cornmeal breadlike griddle cakes) and rice and papa fritas and oh my! It would have been more than enough for the two of us. Lyz asked the waiter what the “grande” size order was like and he spread his arms to indicate enough meat to feed a whole family. The steak was great, drenched in a spicy minced tomato sauce and was only about $8 or 9 for everything that was included.

On Thursday morn, we got into our tiny Chevy “Spark” 5 speed rental and headed out of the city to the Chicamocha region about 50 kms away. Well it was slow but spectacular driving as once out of the city there is only one route through the canyon/mountains and there are tons of trucks as the region of Santander where we were is not far from Venezuela so a lot of commerce is routed through there from Bogota, as Bogota is about 300 kms from Bucaramanga. No problema-we were in no hurry and arrived at the park just before noon.

All I can say is “Wow”! This is a mammoth canyon area and is considered up to the second largest in the world (however, measuring canyons is a very inexact science but I would say based on what I have read is can easily be considered one of the top 5 in the world based on all the factors). The actual park area is not that big and their concept of a National Park does differ from our concept-let's just say it's much more “commercial”.

http://www.colombia.travel/en/international-tourist/where-to-go/recommended-weekend-destinations/chicamocha-canyon

Regardless, the centerpiece is the tram or “teleferico” that, for about $10 a person, takes you down the canyon and then back up to the other side-it is 6.3 kms long (almost 4 and a ½ miles) and takes almost 45 minutes each way. So it easily outdistances the Albuquerque tram but quite a bit. In short, the vistas were amazing from just about every vantage point and I have a lot of them saved on my Webshots link:

http://community.webshots.com/user/richard0154

After about 3-4 hours at the park, we headed off to check into our quaint and quiet posada (like a inn or mini-resort) in San Gil. San Gil is known as a natural excursion jumping off point for rafting, hiking, bungy, waterfall rapelling, hang gliding, etc. with some classic and well maintained traditional Spanish style valles or villages nearby. We ate at a very nice and new restaurante that evening after arranging for a morning rafting excursion for Friday.

http://www.sangil.com.co

Again, the weather was perfect (in the mid 70s in the morning) and the rafting trip was great-lots of steady 2 and 3 level class rapids (Lyz had never rafted before so we did a more mellow river-the Rio Fonce that flowed by our posada and through San Gil) and the two hour trip was only about $13 per person.

After that we spent the afternoon and early evening driving around and had lunch in lovely village of San Jose, known for it's chorizos and we ate a bunch at a very old family restaurante and then ambled around the plaza. Then we headed off in search of a waterfall, Juan Curi, that we had read about. The sign directed us to pull off at what appeared to be someone's casa. Indeed it was and we pulled over on their dirt road. Turns out the trail does lead out from their house and the woman there explained to Lyz that you pay 5000 Colombian pesos (about $2.50) per person and had us enter our info in some sort of government tourist directory. Off we went on a 20 minute hike and the waterfall was spectacular and the best part is that we were the only ones there the whole hour or so we were there! The waterfall was multi-tiered and you could get up to the second main tier quite easily. It was on par with many of the waterfall I love in Oregon but without the tourists! It was practically nirvana!

The afternoon was winding down but we wanted to get to the village of Barichara, considered the loveliest village in all of Colombia. We made it there about 45 minutes before dusk after a beautiful drive through the local hills and it did not disappoint. Again we ambled around and had some lovely cakes and cappuccino (only a dollar for one of the best I have ever had!) at a local cafe/bakery and then set back out to posada and then for dinner at a local restaurant and an evening of unwinding after a long day.

The next morning, we bought some ants, a local Bucarmanga Santander delicacy (it's all explained in this link):

http://www.en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hormigas_culona_or_santandereana

and headed off for a 3 hour drive back to Bucaramanga and the airport for our return to Cartagena. Back in Cartagena, we checked back into the Tres Banderas, a lovely hotel in Centro, near my favorite part of the old city, San Diego Plaza and ate once again at La Cevicheria, which was featured on “No Reservations” on the Travel Channel, hosted by the world class iconoclast, “Mad” Anthony Bourdain. The pescado and mojitos were perfect and we enjoyed another great evening together but alas I had to fly back out the States the next morn.

But we are already planning on meeting up in Lima, Peru in April (flights are actually cheap from the Southwest US area) and our application for a fiancee visa is in processing and if all goes according to plan, Lyz will have her immigration interview at the US counsulate in Bogota in the late spring if not earlier and she will be here in the States in late July or early August after she completes her Nursing Masters in mid-July.

The Greatest Albums of All Time in No Particular Order (entry #6)

Killing Joke-Killing Joke-1980 (Malicious Damage Records)

First of all, check out that cover-pretty much the best ever. Post punk happened fast and blew away the immediate past. PIL killed the Pistols-Rotten style. Wire got art rock right. And Killing Joke broke out and did it in a way and with a sound that has never been matched over their first four releases. On this, their debut in 1980, Jaz Coleman’s growling, guttural, manic animal rants meshed with Geordie’s much more truly distinctive guitar grinding sound than say The Edge’s of the time and a truly tribal rhythm section abetted by metal, punk and industrial tendencies and the fruits of their warfare show in the numerous covers by hack bands even as early as the late 80s (see major hacks for most of their career, Metallica, covering “The Wait” on their Garage Days Revisited ep circa 1987).

I was lucky enough to catch them at the sleazily legendary Bookies club on a depraved stretch of 6 Mile Rd. (not 8 Mile-F Eminem-he is beyond useless-enuff said) near the prison like University of Detroit campus in 1981, shortly after obtaining my driver’s license. It was a revelation to someone just learning about the beauty of noise and whatnot. And to boot, I practically had the place to myself-it was a weekday summer night with maybe 100 heads in attendance. This album had dropped in August of 80’ and they were supporting the just released “What’s This For?” an almost equally stunning world of racket that came out in June of 81'. They played pretty much every track off both to much acclaim. I was converted over completely at that juncture. In retrospect, they were almost like a British update on the Stooges with a nutso frontman flailing in front of a bunch of hardass but disaffected backers who were only concerned with bringing the noise and not making a scene.

“Requiem” kicks off Side one with a throbbing Throbbing Gristle-like industrial synth line that is soon dominated by Geordie’s mammoth slab-like licks and drum thuds and slowly builds up to a swinging mid-tempo very un-punk beat with Jaz' "echoed" chanting with all kinds of nasty effects. “Wardance” is exactly like it sounds-a celebration of mayhem propelled by total tribalism. It embarks with the sample of a power drill and Jaz snorting out a welcome that is most unbecoming augmented by the most sinister and staccato bassline laid down up to that time. “Tomorrow’s World” is beyond delightful in that it has an apocalyptical feel with it art damaged effects and completely languid and turgid sledgehammer pace paced by Jaz's elongated rants that smother the outcome. “Bloodsport” is a somewhat up tempo instrumental that was seemingly groundbreaking at the time but hasn’t stood the test of time tunewise. Oh well, can't win them all.

Side two rips open with the afformentioned “The Wait” that much like “Requiem” burns to a start with a two note buzzsaw soaring synth lick that quickly evolves into the most intense, fast and ultra uber punk-like tune on the record and practically in the history of la monde. “Complications” follows with a serviceable approach to postpunk as it might be described and on the US release their single “Change” appears and like many acts of the time, it is their most mainstream track with subdued guitars and a funky beat yet is the only ennui inducing track on the record. How it was chosen as the "hit" single, I will never know. Luckily “S.O. 36” follows-a somewhat of an ode to Krautrock with it’s sampled German conversation and totally off-kilter but entrancing and mystically dense feel. Basically, nobody did this shit at this time and this is so experimental for a "punk" band that I still do not know what to make of it-except to embrace it. Finally, “Primitive” wraps up the effort with perhaps the most trad Brit metal track on the album but do not be alarmed-it is a monster track that would easily fill up any arena more than even “Smoke on the Water”. Verdad. In closing, there is no band that during the course of four albums that matches the diversity of Killing Joke-Nirvana was close but Cobain offed himself too early because of that skank, Courtney, who seemingly killed him if even indirectly.

An "Engaging" Time on San Andres Isla

Had been working at Fidelity for almost four months and after 8 weeks of training and they 8 more weeks of intense job immersion, I was ready as I always am, for a little time away from the States to unwind and relax. Of course, I was also dying to see my bebe, Lyz aka La Chica Feliz aka L Tres. We arranged to meet on San Andres Island, which is part of Colombia though it is closer to Nicaragua. So how is it a Colombian possession? Read this link for the scoop:


http://www.kafka-franz.com/san-andres-island.htm

San Andres is actually pretty accessible from the US though few American gringos go there (which is great, no ugly Americans so it still remains a bit of a hidden gem) but during the wintery season word is that Canadians are chartered down en masse and for some reason Italians go there even though it is pretty far away. And, of course, tons of Colombians because no passport or visa is necessary. That is what made it easy for Lyz-less than a two hour flight from Cartagena. For me, it was two hours to LAX (abhor that airport) then I flew with Copa Air to Panama City for 6 hours and then a 45 minute flight to San Andres. Easy.

In a way, SA is what you would expect. Pretty typical Caribbean island as far as what it has to offer. Some hotels, some resorts and lots of duty free shopping. However, I do have to say due to the extensive reef system surrounding it (some claim only Belize is better in the Caribbean), the water is pretty spectacular with the claim of 7 shades of blue to be seen. The main beach in the Centro area where most everything is is very, very clean and the sand is great. This area is pedestrian only along the main 10 minutes walkway so it is pretty tranquil for a slightly urban beach area with many hotels/resorts residing across the walkway. I waited out my scuba excursion until day six as the weather was dicey at times-it was around the start of hurricane season and there were a few good downpours and a few afternoons where the beach was not an option, but overall we got 4 solid days of beach time so we did alright that way.

On our second full day, after booking a pretty basic hotel for Saturday night and Sunday in advance just to make sure we had something (we got in at about 2 pm on that Saturday and knew we would be in no mood to search for a place), we tried to see if any of the resorts were running deals since we just hit low season. No luck, all the good ones were booked. Went to a final resort on the main strip and they were booked BUT they managed an apt. a block away from them and the beach that was available. They were asking $100 a night. It was unreal. It was 3 bedrooms, almost brand new and about 1300 sq. ft. We took it. Then we rented a golf cart (yes, true) as the island is shaped like a seahorse and is only 13 kms. by 3 kms. We “puttered” down to an area called San Luis that was known for it's lovely beaches. Very true and it only took us about 30 minutes to get down there with a break for lunch at a very local spot. It was a sweet afternoon on a little slice of sand with a bunch of local kids having a ball nearby.

We stayed at that apartment for two nights and switched for the last three nights to a place nearby that was certainly not as great (Tres Casitas) but it was quaint and our room overlooked the clear water from the second floor. After checking in we spent a rainy Wednesday afternoon watching a Russ Meyer flick that I brought that Lyz totally dug.

On Thursday morning the sky was clear and I walked two minutes over to the dive shop and booked a morning dive. Done by 12:30, I was starving so we found a small, family run place and ate some typical local food-fish or chicken or pork with bean, coconut rice and fried plantains. Not bad for $4 each. They we arranged to go to a spot called the Aquario that sits off of Haynes Cay. In the late afternoon the stingrays congregate near a few sandbars in the area. I had hung with rays in Tahiti ten years ago and they are awesome creatures. But it was Lyz's first time and she was delighted and it was a great afternoon excursion.

The next day was spent going to the nearby Johnny Cay which is a little paradise of a regional park but is pretty touristy with tons of boats coming all day long and lots of people so it was far from romantic. But still the water was amazing, the sand was even softer, the Rastas were all over the place working and pouring Coco Locos and hawking Old Milwaukies (for some reason that I never got an explanation for, Old Milwaukie and Miller High Life seem to be as popular as the national Colombian brands on the island with the locals-yet in Cartagena there were no where to be seen-weird) and cooking up fish and whatnot. And it only took us about 15 or so mins. to walk around the cay. I did not get any photos on Johnny Cay as my camera went bad that morning but Lyz took video and I will post a clip some time after she downloads her clips. After that we went back to the jewelry shop we had been talking to and Lyz picked out her engagement ring. Yes, I got engaged and I could not be happier.

Now we will have to deal with the idiotic US immigration bureaucracy over the next year. Lyz will finish her Masters in Nursing next July in Cartagena and then will come here. I already have some contacts in the US and Colombia to give me advice on how it make the process work best. We will meet up somewhere down there again in mid-December and then probably again in April of 2010.

The Greatest Albums of All Time in No Particular Order (entry #5)

Terminal Cheesecake- King of All Spaceheads (Jackass Records)

The trip begins with a sample of the famous line from Timothy Leary, “The aim of the game is to feel real good” on the opening title track. After that the drug references JUST KEEP COMING ad nauseam. Yet this is not just some hippy-dippy psychedelic album. In fact, it reinvents everything to do with the genre that got its start in the mid 60s and based on everything since, it closes the door with this release about 30 years later in the mid 90s. But let’s digress as they surely would…

Terminal Cheesecake is a brightly dark, sorely obscure British outfit that was noisy and arty and thrashy and all that circa the late 80s. They released a few spectacular though highly uneven works until they hit their stride with their 1990 Pathological Records release, “Angels in Pigtails” which featured an ultra-menacing cover of the Residents classic “Hello Skinny” that was an all out war on the original in a very good way. After that, they ratcheted up the all out drug war to the point of being blatantly obvious-just in case. They followed that up with the exquisite “Pearlesque Kings of the Jewmost” in 1992 that is on par with this release though a bit uneven and repetitious at time (the mythology surrounding the session for this album is that they laid down one basic track and then manipulated it into all the other tracks minus the cover of the Neu! classic, “Seeland” retitled as “Neu Sealand”).

http://www.godflesh.com/related/terminal.html

This album marked the ultimate and necessary end of their existence as their various member moved on to other projects and adventures with VERY middling success. To me, this represents the culmination of their vision, their apex, one of the greatest head trips ever recorded in the annals of musical insanity. Simply put, though they have a very, very dedicated following here and there, they never, ever got their due in England or anywhere else for that matter. Quite distressing. Anyway, on to the tuneage…

But first we interrupt this important message with a message about the art work. See the above pics. That is the exterior and interior covers. ‘Nuff said.

Now back to the our regularly scheduled musical musings.

So I mentioned that the title track starts with a little Timothy Leary. Then the very languid and very thick drums “kick” in. With a little acid surf guitar, elongated and all. And your “announcer” is back and has another special announcement-“What you are listening to musicians performing psychedelic music under the influence of a mind altering chemical”. The tone is set. And the track ambles and rambles beautifully from there.

“Budmeister” is next with just about the thickest booty shaking beat with tons of acid guitar and other insect like noises that should create a dance floor sensation with nasty chanted and echoed vocals. Only, for some strange reason, I was the only one dancing to this track-though I imagine there were cool DJs in England spinning it.

Next up is “God’s Turban and Tutu” rolling along for about 9 minutes or so with the sweetest dub style bassline while our vocalist is running down a list of the preferred substances, “LSD, Mescaline, Psilocybin, etc” in a very hushed tone whilst claiming that you should “walk before jesus”.

“Ginge le Geezer” clocks in as probably the most straight forward track-all dense acid guitar with a 4/4 disco/rock beat that gets the hips shaking with a regular verse/chorus structure. Yet it is still nefarious.

Lo and behold it is “Lo Lo” and “Tibetan Lift Off” where they get all Himalayan on you. Sampling the echoed long ass horns of the Tibetan monks (they have toured the US many a time), the Cheesecake dub out some of their earlier track beats and let it all flail about.

Shortly thereafter, “Herbal Space Flight” plays off of the aforementioned “Ginge le Geezer”, only more acid metal, if such a genre exists. And you can still dance to it.

After a couple of fits and starts with “Black Microdot I and II” (featuring some AWESOME Mariachi samples), the opus magnus concludes with “The Last Temptation of St. Leary” which brings everything full circle with Gregorian chant samples as well as Mr. Leary mentioning that “the LSD trip is a pilgrimage for thousands of years for mystics and visionary philosophers” .

In the end, this album is best experienced with a pair of “kick ass” headphones, just like many albums back in the day. Illicit substances may or may not assist you though, depending on your internal chemical composition.

Always "Wing"in' it

It has been a somewhat somber two weeks or so if you are Detroit Red Wings hockey team devotee. Up 3 games to 2 over the Pittsburgh Penguins in the Stanley Cup final on June 12th and coming off a 5-0 shellacking of the Pens in game 5 five days earlier, the ultimate North American sports franchise over the past two decades somehow found themselves on the losing end of consecutive 2-1 defeats including game 7 at home-something a road team had not done in a finals game 7 since 1971. A tough pill to swallow. Still, this is a franchise that does it the right way with the right management at the top and without idiotic or unlikable players and no one can argue with their success and their up tempo, artistic style of play.

One must remember or know that since NHL expansion in the late 60s from 6 to 12 teams, they went almost 20 years as one of the worst teams and for a time in the 70s they were referred to as the Dead Wings and had last won a Stanley Cup championship in 1955 way before I was around. I grew up through adolescence with them during this era. It blew. They did finally manage to get to the Western Conference finals in 1987 and won game one in Edmonton, only to be trounced in 4 straight by the mighty Oilers who were extending their dynasty.

They flirted on and off with success over the next 8 seasons and finally managed to get back to the Stanley Cup finals in 1995 (first time since the early sixties) only to routed by the abhorrently dull, defensive and pedestrian New Jersey Devils in a sweep. But they kept at it and finally broke through and won a Cup in 97’ and once again the next year in 98’ with a bunch of Russians both times and re-tooled and won another in 02’ with a quirky Czech goalie legend and then re-tooled with a bunch of Swedes and won last year. The blueprint was always the same-elegant teamwork with a solid work ethic. So as much as Wings fans rue the loss this year, they are still 4-2 in Cup finals since 95’ and have appeared in 6 of the last 14 Cup finals (there was no Cup awarded in 2005 due to the idiotic lock out which shut down the season). No one else in the league is even close to that kind of run and they have been in the playoffs every year since 1991, usually a 1 or 2 seed going into the playoffs. No other franchise in any other major sport comes close either. So if you are not a hockey fan and are looking for a team to follow, of course I recommend them as the place to start, no matter how biased I am.

The Greatest Albums of All Time In No Particular Order (entry # 4)

Throbbing Gristle- Heathen Earth-1980 (Industrial Records)

I recently rediscovered this somewhat lost album that I adored as it officially is considered not exactly a proper album release by them (they only did two studio albums before this) as it was recorded live in the studio and was also officially their last release in 1980 but in all senses this is a proper album with all new material and it cemented TG as the ultimate forebearers of industrial music (after all their label was called Industrial Records) that permeates the mainstream from the good (Ministry) to the bad (Nine Inch Nails)-they are that influential to this very day and kill most of the fakers out there. Plus, they have the greatest band name ever. I mean, who doesn't want their gristle to throb, am I right?

Why did I stumble across it? Well, TG was just back on tour in the US for the first time in about 30 years with all the original members and doing more dates than just Frisco (heck, they played that hipster fest Coachella too):


http://www.losanjealous.com/2009/02/04/throbbing-gristle-to-tour-usa-play-6000-capacity-tent-at-coachella-ucla/

So you end up going through phases and hitting amazing things again that got left as gristle on the roadside.

So the legend of TG endures. And this album is the best introduction in my estimation as it is not as obtuse as some of their early work (Hamburger Lady, anyone?) though it is highly dark and experimental yet doesn't dabble in some of the pop like results that show up on some of their singles
(“United” is better than any love song that ABBA put out in my estimation and I love ABBA). This album in particular makes total noise somewhat comforting and lovable if that makes sense.

It commences with “Cornets”-four minutes plus of Cosi Fanni Tutti (ex-stripper and perfect fetish girl, BTW) riffing on a cornet-


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cornets

in very processed/looped way that hints at the concepts of Fripp/Eno regarding what they did with guitar. Truly outer spacious. “The Old Man Smiled” follows with it's creepy beat with Genesis P- Orridge mumbling about “can the world be as sad as it seems? in a cafe in Tangiers” over some of the most sinister guitar feedback and drumbox foxtrot ambling ever put down on tape.

Shortly after that, is the ultra cinematic “The World Is A War Film” with the ultimate electronically looped synths providing the basis for the nastiest dreamwalk. Which leads to “Dreamachine”-probably the greatest industrial tune ever san vocals. That devolves into “Still Walking”-an echoed dialogue between the aforementioned Cosi Fanni Tutti and Chris Carter (they were lovers and husband/wife back then and still are-TG folks are so trad and the Republicans would love them!) about hooking up for some “action” done with all kinds of spectacular vocal effects and delays and loops and whatnot.

The work closes under the uber funky and cornet led “Don't Do As You Are Told, Do As You Think” in which Gen seems to “dictate” that we should all be Libertarians (at least in my interpretation). In closing, TG might be one of the most obscure but most influential acts out there.